Running to stay still

Yes, another one for you....
I know you know how much pissed off I am at you and your behavior and the funniest thing ever is that you could not care less....It does not matter how much I yell, scream, cry, try to reach you.....you keep hiding and driving me nuts....
Did you have a good weekend with your entire family?
Because you know what? I am so fricking tired to be nice and try to understand :"MariaLaura does not understand me and the situation" what in the world is there to understand?!?If you don't talk to me how can I understand?!? The only thing that I understand is that you did not even bother calling me after the big important weekend....this is the only thing I am understanding while trying to be strong and make the most out of this all crap....
You gotta explain me the meaning you give to the word love, because I think we get some issues here since I call love something much different than this....
Yes, you are now winning over me and I am the weakest between us, but just because I LOVE YOU and this is pretty difficult to put aside....don't take me for granted, I will not be here forever taking crap from you and trying to understanding why you are treating worse than I treat my garbage can....and yes, go ahead and hide behind the :"I don't call you because you yell at me..." good boy, great behavior....this is the kind of communication we need in our already messed up enough relationship....
And this is it for this monologue of mine...no worries, I am not expecting you to answer...this is my therapy to keep going, while you are totally and absolutely ignoring me....